Saturday, August 11, 2007

InDruBloDa: A work in progress

7:23pm
Beer. Oh yum. The start of this particular event is brought to you by Hammer 'n' Tongs Draught. Strangely appropriate.

I just drove the new bomb car, named Myrtle by the flatmates, the entire three blocks (damn life is hard) to the supermarket for cigarettes. I couldn't face a night like this on empty when it comes to smoking. Health problems be damned, I'm killing brain cells here.

So. Three blocks. And I have a flat tyre. The day just gets better. Let's drink to that.

7:33pm
And onto the second. Don't worry, there won't be a drink by drink description here, I'm just not sure what the hell to write about yet.

I love to drink my beer from the bottle. Stubbies, we call them. Unless they're the 250mL variety, in which case it is called a Throwdown. Thoe things (throwdowns) are dangerous. The carton price is so cheap and deceptive... I can chew my way through most of a carton without noticing.

I drink from the bottle, but I don't like to get my hands cold. Enter with fanfare:



The Stubby Cooler.

Dual purpose insulation. Beer stays cold, hands stay warm. I prefer a stubby cooler with a bottom on it, or the zip-up variety, mainly because I like the odd boutique beer and they tend to [for stupid boutique reasons] come in a smaller, thinner bottle that just doesn't fit the standard cooler. Go figure. Bastards.

7:58pm
In my search for pictures of stubby coolers for the last time segment I came up with this. All I did was a Google Image search and there it was.

For those who can't be bothered linking, (it's so worth it) it is a story about a UPS guy who gets a blowjob while driving and crashes his car. It's gold.
The gap between the steering wheel and Kevin's gut was making movement difficult though, for both of them. Kevin's face puckered into a thousand-hamburger-grimace-of-regret as he pushed himself back harder into the seat...


What a cool author. I'm off to read more...

8:14pm
And a linkfest brings me to Chnlove. A site that matches you with Chinese women to marry. I kid you not. I'm floored. If you meet your perfect match, you can fly to China and marry her. So the question posed by housemate CruiseyDyke is this:

Do they come with Ping Pong balls? Or do you have to supply your own?


8:45pm
Like a typical drinking household, we've ordered pizza. I'm still undecided about going out for a bit.

Household gems:

CruiseyDyke: Ive decided... I'm freezing my cunt off.
Gayman: Try this. Rub both hands together. And then put them there.
Cruisey: Show me?

Don't try this at home, children.

9:07pm
Some down, many to go.

My good friend that was going to drag me out on the town has not showed. So I'm not going. Neither has the pizza. And that has me pissed off.

9:31pm
I've attacked tonight with a vengeance. Some will know why. Others will know I'm drinking because it's Saturday night. Both reasons work.

9:40pm
It's time for a meme of sorts. Last time I did NaDruBloDa I was living alone and had to search out memes to do for my post. Now I have flatmates so they can ask the questions.

HERE GOES:

Gaymanm asks: Are you gay?
No brainer. Umm. Yes? Does it count that I am completely attracted to a bisexual?

CruiseyDyke: How awesome am I?
And she answered herself here. I'll tell you how great I am. I am the greatest thing since sliced fucking bread. That's how great I am.

9:52pm
I came home last night, weekend plans shot to shit and I didn't have a clue what to do. It's... like I had an idea and when it didn't work out the energy just wasn't there. I came home at... I don't know... around eight o'clock in the evening and I literally passed out on my own bed. Fully clothed. The wrong side. Everything.

I woke up somewhere in the middle of the night knowing that I was freezing. I had to undo my Docs shoelaces and it was SO hard. I knew I was on top of the covers. But how to fix that? It was well beyond me.

10:04pm
I'm sorry, Drunk Blogging world. I can't do this much longer today. I will hold another, unofficial day of my own (actually, probably many) later but my head is un/officially fucked.

Night.
VB

6 comments:

Rootietoot said...

Beautiful!
We call stubby coolers "koozies" here. I have no idea why.

dive said...

G'night, Vic.
You're a hero, mate!
xox

Taz said...

Good Morning - though I'm sure we won't see you for some time yet =). Hope whatever it is gets better. <3

Vic said...

Hi Rootie! That was possibly the most crap drunken post I've ever written. I'll have to do another one day to make up for it!

I don't think "koozies" as a word for stubby coolers would catch on here... It just doesn't seem blokey enough.

Dive I slept like a log, thanks. But why am I a hero?

and Good Morning Taz! I'm up and about though hung over. "Whatever it is" is basically me just having an unnecessary brain fart that saw me playing a lot of much needed guitar. So it's got a positive outcome. Cheers for your thoughts, mate.

Terroni said...

Fabulous drunk blogging day! If I wasn't at work, I'd be joining you in a heartbeat.

Vic said...

Thanks, T. Wish you could have been there, too.