Dear LittleTyke,
A week ago you were supposed to arrive in the world, thus giving me the hereditary honour of being ordained Auntie Vic.
It is with great dismay that already I have to teach one of the most important concepts in life. Punctuality. Despite the saying, it is not at all fashoinable to be late. Being early also represents an unanticpated hassle for your host and should be avoided.
In future please remember to arrive on time. The honour of becoming a doting relative for the first time will only occur once for me, and frankly it's frustrating as all hell to be kept waiting.
That will be all.
your Auntie Vic.
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8 comments:
Good things come to those that wait.
Congrats... early ;-)
Good things indeed, JC.
Sorry, Vic, but I've got a mental picture of you pacing up and down outside the delivery room, chewing on a fat cigar.
Have patience. The world's a big stage and Tyke's gotta spend some time in the dressing room getting properly prepared to make a grand entrance.
Many congratulations on your impending auntie-dom.
Great things also come to those who get pissed off and jump to the front of the queue, JC!
My Auntie-dom will be a long and distinguished reign indeed, Dive.
It just has to start yet.
Auntie Groover.
That is indeed kinda groovy.
Dear future auntie vic, babies come in their own sweet time. Please stop stomping around the house like rumpelstiltskin having a hissy fit.
Lol... you can get pissed off till you turn purple faced, that ain't gonna speed up your little Tyke.
My mental picture, thanks to your faithful readers, just got too funny for words.
Looking forward to a snapshot...
Dive - and the child be taught to groove at any opportunity. It is my duty!
Kate - anticipation turns me into a caged animal. Get some popcorn, shove me in a corner and poke me with a stick every now and then. Sit back and watch the fireworks display. It's a hell of a lot better than Big Brother but you can't change channels.
JC - I'll bet. Rumplestiltskin stomping back and forth while chewing a cigar.
And of course there'll be snapshots! I think I'm going to be worse than the parents when it comes to continuously documenting LittleTyke's progress!
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